“Raising children has become significantly
more time-consuming and expensive, amid a sense that opportunity has grown more
elusive.”
“The amount of money parents
spend on children, which used to peak when they were in high school, is now
highest when they are under 6 and over 18 and into their mid-20s.”
“For the first time, it’s as likely as not that American children will be
less prosperous than their parents.”
“ ‘Intensive parenting is a way for especially affluent
white mothers to make sure their children are maintaining their advantaged
position in society,” said Jessica Calarco, a sociologist at Indiana University
and author of “Negotiating Opportunities: How
the Middle Class Secures Advantages in School.’ ”
“The time parents spend in the
presence of their children has not changed much, but parents today spend more
of it doing hands-on child care. Time spent on activities like reading to
children; doing crafts; taking them to lessons; attending recitals and games;
and helping with homework has increased the most. Today, mothers spend
nearly five hours a week on that, compared with 1 hour 45 minutes
hours in 1975 — and they worry it’s not enough.”
“Parenthood is more hands-off in many other countries. In Tokyo,
children start riding the subway alone by first grade, and in Paris, they spend
afternoons unaccompanied at playgrounds. Intensive parenting has gained
popularity in England and Australia, but it has distinctly American roots —
reflecting a view of child rearing as an individual,
not societal, task.”
“Rich parents have more to spend, but the share of income that poor
parents spend on their children has also grown.”
“As low-income parents have increased the time they spend teaching and
reading to their children, the readiness gap between kindergarten students from
rich and poor families has shrunk.”
“Psychologists and others have raised alarms about children’s high levels of
stress and dependence on their parents, and the need to develop
independence, self-reliance and grit. Research has shown that children with hyper-involved
parents have more anxiety and less satisfaction with life, and that when
children play unsupervised, they build social skills, emotional maturity
and executive function.”